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Back a step
Quietude
Posts: 1,622 Status: Duke Karma: +630 [+1] [-1] |
Subject: Applying for Job as Bovine spokesperson | |||||
Dear Cattle, It recently came to my attention that your years long campaign to encourage poultry consumption through the 'eat more chiken' commercials has reached it's zenith, and is no longer causing a decrease in beef consumption. While I found the strategy brilliant, and encourage you to keep it up, I'm suggesting that you launch a secondary campaign touting the benefits of fish consumption. And who better to head the campaign than myself as a proud member of the commercial trout fisherman's association(CTFA)? (Unless perhaps it is DarkSol, the ground breaking fisherman from knox). Did you know that the seas of DW used to be pristine, with plenty of space for other species to wander about? Now the seas are clogged with rainbow trout crowding out other species.... Daily, millions of trout are removed, but they just keep reproducing at prodigious rates. The CTFA is doing their best to combat this problem. In addition to maintaining the biodiversity of our seas, there are many health benefits involved with eating trout. The protein to fat ratio leads to lower incidence of heart disease. The oils from the fish also aid skin tone and hair growth. Finally, I must point out that fish farms are much better for the environment. They have almost none of the methane emissions of a working cattle ranch, and it's not necessary to clearcut rainforest to make room for them. Therefore I say - Eat trout, more trout and stock your freezer with trout. Delicious, responsible and healthy - the perfect choice. Best Regards, Quietude Potential PR Flak and proud member of CTFA |
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