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Quiet_Quince
Posts: 1,622
Status: Duke

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Subject: Funny exchange
i very much enjoyed the below exchange with OX. His humour and wit always make me smile. Hope you enjoy it as well....



June 19 2011 05:44 pm MDT
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From: Quiet_Quince
Dear Ox,
I am contacting you on behalf of the Farmers Legal Department. You recently contacted a member of our agricultural department regarding an issue you were having. She flagged the below mail for my attention:

From: Ox
Hmmm, I sure am running out of people to kill awfully fast. I wonder who I'm venning against?

First, I must mention that this does look very much like conspiracy to commit murder on your part, even conspiracy to commit genocide depending on the scale of your attacks and the selection criteria you use when proceeding with your plans.

Second, I must deny your implication that a member of Farmers would be involved in any act of murder or conspiracy to commit genocide.

And Finally, while still denying any alleged involvement of Farmers in the unfortunate demise of the above mentioned people, we would like to point out that your "mysterious benefactor" prevented you from committing potential genocide, as well as helping you on your spiritual path by redirecting your energy to more peaceful outlets.

Best Regards,
Quiet Quince
Farmers Jr. Partner for Legal Services

June 19 2011 05:33 pm MDT
____________________________________________________
From: Ox
Dear Q,

As an official guardhouse lawyer I must point out that I am under no obligation to abide by the laws of humans. Oxen around the world have been enslaved as beasts of burden for thousands of years. Well this practice has got to stop. And I shall be the one to stop it. Even if I have to murder every human that dares to set foot in my ven.

As far as implying that Shrooms had something to do with the ven emptying out... well I did no such thing. I just know that Shrooms is like a delicate flower, that grows in manure, and she needs protecting. I was only speculating out loud about who she might need to protect herself against.

Lastly... screw my benefactor. We need targets if we're going to hold on to third place!

Best Regards,
Ox
AAFOSAQ (Almost As Full OF Shit As Quince)

P.S. When a Farmer walks into a room, does the theme from Farmer's Insurance fill the air?

"We are Farmers! dum de dum de dum dum dum"

That would be so cool.
__________________________________________
June 19 2011 06:35 pm MDT
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From: Quiet_Quince
Dear Ox,
Thank you for your courteous reply. I’d like to call to your attention a few notes:

First, although there may exist bovine courts and systems of justice that in your mind supersede the human systems I was referring to, outside of India they are largely considered irrelevant.

I whole heartedly agree that shrooms is a delicate flower, innocent of any wrong doing, and am pleased at your decision to put this in writing. I trust that, should we ever need to, we could call on you as a character witness?

Lastly, while I whole-heartedly support your endeavors to remain in third place, I’m not sure that screwing the benefactor would be the best way to discourage them. If you really have that much trouble in the boudoir, there is a sex-therapist I can refer you and MD to. Aside from that option, I would assume your bovine activism would have put you in touch with certain literature from India?

Best Regards,
Quiet Quince
FOOBS (Full of Ox’s Bull Shit)

PS. While Farmers Insurance is a wholly owned subsidiary of the Farmers Clan, we do support their business. In fact, we are discussing with them ways to sell venning insurance.

PPS. Want to post this in Game Discussion with me?
________________________________________
from OX:

"Perhaps Non Game Discussion would be better. After you post it I'll give it my endorsement.

I'd love to come up with an adequate response to you but I'm just out of time. I will leave you with this parting thought.

We started the day in 6th place. After discussions with Shrooms about trespassers in the ven, ****************
*********************************************************
censored****************************************
Perhaps you should leave that last part out of your post."

I guess i'll leave the third point a mystery and say that i was duly corrected.


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Time Posted: June 19 2011 09:11 pm EDT
Last updated: June 20 2011 05:53 pm EDT


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